Lately I've been oh so bummed out about teaching. Why is it still so hard after all these years? I'm so ready to enjoy it so much more, to have it be so much easier, whatever.
My sister is in town, and this afternoon she stopped by office hours and met three of my students, all studying for a quiz tomorrow, even though it's the first week of 2nd quarter and they've never come to office hours before, and it's after 4pm, etc. etc.
I have been forgetting that 75% of the job is awesome. Exactly what I want, exactly what I am good at, exactly what will help me grow into being more of the person I want to be, exactly that thing (one thing, anyway) that will serve the world.
This morning in my most adorable class, one of my most adorable students asked me if I had dressed up as Justin Bieber for Halloween. I was like, "Yo, I'm dressed up like Justin Bieber every day" and started singing Baby, Baby, Baby. He asked me to do a head toss like Justin. I did it. It was hilarious and adorable. Have I mentioned how cute my students are?
Remember the good stuff, people. Especially now as it gets dark and Thanksgiving blues attack our sweet ones. Take time to connect with the kids you love, the kids who love you. You're doing great. You're doing great. You're doing great.
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Monday, November 1, 2010
Voting Math
If you're looking for an election day lesson, check this out. The brilliant Patrick Honner and the NY Times Learning Network pair up to bring you the best of mathematical curriculum writing.
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
Just a little patience
Last night at meditation class I taught about patience. I had been thinking about patience as a virtue that had to with time, but when I started contemplating it last night, it took on a new meaning that has only to do with any given present moment. When I am impatient, I am resisting whatever it is that's happening right now. When I practice patience, I am looking directly at what's in front of me and making my decisions from there.
All the waiting, all the holding back, that is impatience too. Patience is receiving, compassion, acceptance, welcome. Patience is loving, paying attention.
As a meditation teacher, talking about patience is really important because people need to be patient with themselves in order to practice. If all they time they are aspiring to be in some kind of mental silence, and impatient with themselves when they're not, it's going to be a rough ride. In my classroom, it's the same way.
Yesterday I got so impatient with my students for not being as fully prepared as I thought they should be. Maybe they should have been, maybe not. My impatience just made me unhappy and ineffective. I just refused to accept that they hadn't done what I'd asked them to do. Amazing.
Today whatever happens, I'm hoping I can remember this universal patience that receives what there is in the present moment and responds accordingly. I hope to be patient with my students and myself, and to experience and extend a kind of grand support from that. We'll see how it goes.
Saturday, October 2, 2010
The 5th year
I did it: yesterday, I gave quizzes in all my classes, and we meditated beforehand and while they worked I walked around with cookies. They were polite and if it wasn't magic it was fun and it felt good to me. I felt like I was paying tribute to my dear old teacher VanA, and that I was honoring the youth and hearts of my students.
I've been wondering if our most difficult students are easier than in previous years. That's what it feels like to me and I'm curious if it's me, if it's them, if it's some combination.
Four years ago I had these two boys, GN and GM in one of my 9th grade classes. I tried everything I could think of, but if those two were there, we couldn't accomplish anything. That was my 2nd year teaching. These were the two that came to mind when I was remembering the terrors of past years. Behavioral nightmares, disrespectful and unwilling to do any work, distractions to the whole class, reminders of my despair*.
When I remembered them deliberately and imagined them coming into my room this year, I realized that I have just changed beyond recognition. This job has given me patience beyond what I ever thought necessary. It has clarified my vision, allowing me to see the tenderness and lovability of adolescents. I have learned to observe, I have practiced not taking things personally, investing myself in the lengthy creative process of a year or four rather than the daily proof of my failure or success.
My new 9th graders are testing this version of Jesse the teacher. That's hard, but I think it's a good sign. I can pass this test.
And people, I'm thinking all the time about the mathematics. I've got all sorts of questions about it and ideas and inspiration about the wonders of this textbook and the mystery of good pedagogy. But at the moment, if the relationships I am participating in and facilitating with and among my students feel safe and positive then I can work out the rest. The relief is palpable.
Have a great weekend. Enjoy fall.
*Just for the record, I ended up having great relationships with both these kids once I didn't teach them. They matured and GM in particular impressed me with his biting insights and sincere intelligence.
I've been wondering if our most difficult students are easier than in previous years. That's what it feels like to me and I'm curious if it's me, if it's them, if it's some combination.
Four years ago I had these two boys, GN and GM in one of my 9th grade classes. I tried everything I could think of, but if those two were there, we couldn't accomplish anything. That was my 2nd year teaching. These were the two that came to mind when I was remembering the terrors of past years. Behavioral nightmares, disrespectful and unwilling to do any work, distractions to the whole class, reminders of my despair*.
When I remembered them deliberately and imagined them coming into my room this year, I realized that I have just changed beyond recognition. This job has given me patience beyond what I ever thought necessary. It has clarified my vision, allowing me to see the tenderness and lovability of adolescents. I have learned to observe, I have practiced not taking things personally, investing myself in the lengthy creative process of a year or four rather than the daily proof of my failure or success.
My new 9th graders are testing this version of Jesse the teacher. That's hard, but I think it's a good sign. I can pass this test.
And people, I'm thinking all the time about the mathematics. I've got all sorts of questions about it and ideas and inspiration about the wonders of this textbook and the mystery of good pedagogy. But at the moment, if the relationships I am participating in and facilitating with and among my students feel safe and positive then I can work out the rest. The relief is palpable.
Have a great weekend. Enjoy fall.
*Just for the record, I ended up having great relationships with both these kids once I didn't teach them. They matured and GM in particular impressed me with his biting insights and sincere intelligence.
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
It's Wednesday
The Introduction of a Textbook
Have I mentioned that I'm using a textbook for the first time ever? I work at a school that values teacher creativity and student personalization, and though the school is full of textbooks, I have never used one for planning, and when I've tried to adapt something from a textbook for teaching, it's been hit and miss. The math department bought it's last text specifically because it provided lots of practice problems, so we could focus on pedagogy and not coming up with equations that have nice integer solutions, for example. It's good at that, but that's not what I've been focused on and so I haven't used it. I was prepared to never use a textbook.
Until now.
I'm using the CME Project's Algebra 1 text, and I'm excited and inspired and full of faith and hope and also utterly perplexed by how to integrate it into my classroom, not because it's limited but because I just don't know where textbooks fit in. Up until now I've been creating my own worksheets and activities, specially designed most every day for the class I'm about to see and set up to make on task work visible.
I have so many questions it's crazy. The main thing I want to share today is that, despite the fact that I'm a little disorganized as I try to figure out how to integrate this book, and my students may be doing less work than they are capable of, I am so satisfied by what my kids are doing when they are working. This book is just all about conceptual understanding, every single question provides multiple access points and demands real thinking. There is something interesting to talk about every day. That blows my mind.
---
Teaching Meditation
I teach meditation twice a week at yoga studios in Brooklyn. These classes are awesome and it's an amazing thing to be able to do and share with people. Last night, two of my students showed up, one by surprise. I felt a little nervous at first, uncertain about how to be myself the meditation teacher without somehow breaching some unspoken code as their math teacher. They were just undeniably amazing. They had amazing experiences, they inspired the people in the class, they inspired me. They have passion, enthusiasm and wisdom beyond their years and I just felt honored to the max to be able to share such tender truth with them.
When I was in 7th grade, I had an amazing math teacher named John VanAlstyne who we called VanA. He taught us algebra and baked us cookies to eat whenever we took math tests. This year, I've decided to experiment with following a version of his example. This year on test days, I'm going to lead my kids in meditation for two minutes, give them cookies and then pass out the test. I feel generous and abundant just thinking about it. The days that I actually bake will be the special ones. May there be many of them.
Have I mentioned that I'm using a textbook for the first time ever? I work at a school that values teacher creativity and student personalization, and though the school is full of textbooks, I have never used one for planning, and when I've tried to adapt something from a textbook for teaching, it's been hit and miss. The math department bought it's last text specifically because it provided lots of practice problems, so we could focus on pedagogy and not coming up with equations that have nice integer solutions, for example. It's good at that, but that's not what I've been focused on and so I haven't used it. I was prepared to never use a textbook.
Until now.
I'm using the CME Project's Algebra 1 text, and I'm excited and inspired and full of faith and hope and also utterly perplexed by how to integrate it into my classroom, not because it's limited but because I just don't know where textbooks fit in. Up until now I've been creating my own worksheets and activities, specially designed most every day for the class I'm about to see and set up to make on task work visible.
I have so many questions it's crazy. The main thing I want to share today is that, despite the fact that I'm a little disorganized as I try to figure out how to integrate this book, and my students may be doing less work than they are capable of, I am so satisfied by what my kids are doing when they are working. This book is just all about conceptual understanding, every single question provides multiple access points and demands real thinking. There is something interesting to talk about every day. That blows my mind.
---
Teaching Meditation
I teach meditation twice a week at yoga studios in Brooklyn. These classes are awesome and it's an amazing thing to be able to do and share with people. Last night, two of my students showed up, one by surprise. I felt a little nervous at first, uncertain about how to be myself the meditation teacher without somehow breaching some unspoken code as their math teacher. They were just undeniably amazing. They had amazing experiences, they inspired the people in the class, they inspired me. They have passion, enthusiasm and wisdom beyond their years and I just felt honored to the max to be able to share such tender truth with them.
When I was in 7th grade, I had an amazing math teacher named John VanAlstyne who we called VanA. He taught us algebra and baked us cookies to eat whenever we took math tests. This year, I've decided to experiment with following a version of his example. This year on test days, I'm going to lead my kids in meditation for two minutes, give them cookies and then pass out the test. I feel generous and abundant just thinking about it. The days that I actually bake will be the special ones. May there be many of them.
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